Here is a list of all the things that only people over the age of 50 know.

Is it just me or is everyone keen on a list?

They’re not too hard to read and if you’re bossy, like me, they are very easy to write.

I turn 50 on Sunday and that makes me older and wiser. Here is a list of all the things that only people over the age of 50 know.

Beautiful people are not better off than the rest of us.  While it might feel like they get all the attention and opportunities, it’s just not true.  Blondes don’t have more fun and money doesn’t buy happiness.  You are perfectly imperfect, just the way you are, and you have everything you need.

Get the body you want when you’re young.  Letting yourself eat too much is a bad habit and very hard to break when you’re older. That’s what I’ve heard, anyway.

Look for a partner who is smart and kind.  If they argue like a grown up and smile at babies in prams you’re off to a good start.  If they listen to your work stories without making suggestions and happily show their face at your aunty’s birthday party, hold on tight.

This isn’t for everyone but for people like me, don’t go making fancy investments.  Stick to your knitting.  Take your wage and save a little every week.  Maybe put it into bricks and mortar but don’t put your money into other people’s hands. The only person who cares about your future is you.

Say yes to adventure.  To the friend that wants to learn to play golf, to the new job and the trip overseas.  Life is so quick.  Especially the bit in the middle with little kids, that goes by like a blur.  Do lots of stuff and take lots of photos.  It’s good to have something to look forward to, and even sweeter to look back.

Have more children than other people think you should. Don’t kid yourself you need money for babies, how much they cost is up to you.  Children bring their own love, and they only care about what other people have got if you do. When they are teenagers and want stuff, make them get a job.  It’s good for them.

I have three beautiful kids. I regret not having more.

Don’t stay in a job you don’t like.  If you are whinging at work, you’re not helping and everyone secretly hates you for it.  I think radio is the easiest most fun job in the world, but I know plenty of people who couldn’t wait to get out. It’s up to you to find your thing.

Make friends of all sizes, ages and colours. You’ll eat better food, listen to better music and hear better stories.

And don’t worry about getting older, just look how smart you’ll be.

Caroline xx


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